


If you think my life is easy, you're wrong.

by aumonstax



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-03-30
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:00:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23395918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aumonstax/pseuds/aumonstax
Summary: Kihyun can change his appearance as he desires. He's in love with Jooheon but he never shows him his real appearance, 'cause he's afraid to not be accepted. One day Kihyun loses his ability and has to show his real self to Jooheon, who accepts him as he is.( https://twitter.com/aumonstax/status/1125344173174022146?s=08 )
Relationships: Lee Jooheon/Yoo Kihyun
Comments: 4
Kudos: 10





	If you think my life is easy, you're wrong.

# 

#  **CHAPTER I: THE MEETING**

If you think my life is easy, you’re wrong: do you have any idea what it means to waste energies to have a body that isn’t mine? I don’t even remember how long I’ve been like this, I only know I can’t show my real face to anyone, especially to him, Jooheon. Me and Jooheon… We’ve been dating a few months now, but I never told him about my power and he seems blind about that, but I can feel that something’s wrong. Things between us are perfect, but there’s something that doesn’t work in me: sometimes it’s difficult to transform myself and return to my human appearance and I’m afraid, it seems like my battery is losing power. The problem is: I can’t ask for help to anyone and unfortunately, it doesn’t exist an instruction book for people like me. I can’t swallow a pillow and fix everything. I can’t wash my face hoping that the next day everything will be alright. There’s no cure for me, and I’m worried ‘cause I can’t lose Jooheon. I love him since that day…

I worked in a toy center, and I actually loved that job: it wasn’t my dream job, but I didn’t mind to see parents enter the shop with their little kids, get on my knees and suggest them something to buy. I liked children. I didn’t know from who I got that love, ‘cause my parents didn’t have the same interest: they had abandoned me when I was a child, in front of an orphanage and from that moment I on, I never knew anything about them. The people who worked in that orphanage seemed to know what creature I was and why sometimes my body was covered in scales when I touched the sea water. When I was a child I wasn’t worried about that, but with time I started to understand that it could be a big problem. When I was in the orphanage I could show my real form, but those who took care of me taught me to change my appearance when I was outside: I took the form of a normal child, without my scales showing and my eyes being in a normal dark color. In my real form, one of them was red and the other one was blue, a strange thing. Too strange.

«Excuse me…»

A new and gentle voice waked me up from some sort of trance, making me shake my head to get it together. I looked up and right before my eyes there was Jooheon. I didn’t know his name yet.

«We’re looking for the plush ward, but this place is really huge. Could you please help us?»

I was twenty-three years old – I had a very productive fantasy and it always ran wildly when a handsome boy showed up. I was totally sure, also, that girls weren’t my thing. I liked the mas friends, but they didn’t attract me. Boys, on the other side, well… They attracted me as hell.

«Yeah, sure! Ehy, hello, pretty lady,» I said, crouching on the floor to pat the head of a cute kid that was holding a plush – her own, probably – and looked at me like I could be her savior or a super hero who could make all her problem vanish in a matter of seconds. I hoped I was like that. «What’s your name?»

«Sako…»

«And what’s your dad’s name?»

I knew how to be cheeky, above all when a kid’s innocence could help me: however, that was the first time I asked someone’s name to his daughter. That was quite embarassing.

«Oh no no! I’m not her father… She’s my sister,» that was the boy’s answer. After that, he started to laugh: «do I look that old?!»

Now THAT was embarrassing, but I started to laugh too, standing up to shake his hand. I just made a shitty figure, so I chose to bet everything on the humor. If that was a point in my favor or not, I didn’t know. If he thought of me as an idiot, I couldn’t have blamed him. I probably would have judged me in the same way.

«I’m Kihyun, by the way. You don’t look old, I swear, but I meet a lot of your parents these days. And they’re the most confused. And you looked a little… Well, I’m sorry.»

He shook my hand and smiled fondly at me. In that very moment I noted his dimples, so deep that my little fingers, surely, would have drowned in it. They were beautiful.

«I’m Jooheon, nice to meet you! Don’t worry, by the way. We have a huge age gap, she could really be my daughter after all. Well… About those plushies…?»

I totally forgot about those plushies. I came back to reality and invited him shyly to follow me, bringing he and his sister where all the plushies were: they had all types of dimensions, forms and textures. I loved that part of the shop; that was probably because I had never had a plush during my childhood, not a single one. All that I learned during that period of my life was how to take under control my power. Nothing else. I didn’t even know who my parents were. Maybe that was the reason why I loved so much my job in that toys shop. I secretly envied all those little kids and their happy childhood and every time I helped them or simply looked at them, I felt a little sad but also a little happy for them. Well, it wasn’t my fault if I was born as some sort of triton. I could easily breathe under water, I had gills, scales, webbed hands… Wow. Such a cool power. Nope.

(…)

«So… Thank you for your advice. This plush is… So huge that I don’t really know how I’m gonna put it inside my car,» said Jooheon, who held in his arms an enormous bear plush that was, literally, bigger than him. I bursted in a sincere laugh from behind the cash desk. I helped them happily and I ended up talking about this and that with that kid’s brother, and so I learned something about him: his house was not far from the toys shop, he liked the sea (he told me about how often they went to the beach because Sako love it a lot), and that he was only twenty years old. Not a critical conversation, but still friendly. He was sweet and funny, and I really wanted to see him again. Something about him attracted me more than I predicted.

And so when I proceeded with the payment, I wrote my phone number behind the receipt and then lend it to him. I saw him smile, take his sister’s hand in his, and then go out. I hoped that was a positive sign.

My hopes were not wasted: that very evening, he wrote me ok kakaotalk and I felt like a teenager at her first crush. It happened other times that I had found someone attractive, but not so much to lend him my phone number hoping that he’ll write me as soon as possible. I didn’t know what part of that guy made him shine in my eyes, but there certainly was something different about him. Maybe his young eyes – a look not so different than mine – or his will to make his little sister happy with a gift, but not knowing where to go or how to look for a present in a shop. I asked myself if his phrase, that “She could really be my daughter” was referring only to their age gap, or maybe to something more difficult, like family problems. What was sure, was that I couldn’t go that deep yet, in my investigation. I barely knew his name… And, oh, yes, that he liked the see.

We started chatting through messages and it was fun, because he didn’t even ask me why I left my phone number on the back of the receipt: he had took for granted the idea of writing me without making questions, and I was grateful for that. I was calm, too, even if that was a first for me. I’d never done something like that before, but I had no fear. I wasn’t gonna get hurt. It was only attraction, and maybe we could become friends… with benefits. Yes. I was a virgin at that time, but I wasn’t ashamed of it. I had lived in the orphanage until I was eighteen years old and it had been difficult for me to make friends, but then I got into public school and in the end, when I got that job in the toys shop, I left everything. School wasn’t for me. I liked to work, because it allowed me to be active and not get lazy and waste time, something that I ended up doing every time I tried to study.

That night I learned different things about Jooheon: he was a university student, and his major was in English literature; he loved to read and he also was good at sports, like football and tennis. The more we talked, the more I felt attracted to him like a magnet, the more I came to the conclusion that I had absolutely nothing to offer to him. I was good at drawing, yeah, I learned it back in the orphanage, but I wasn’t THAT good in it to brag about it. I read, obviously, and we also had some reading tastes in common… but what else? I never finished school and I worked in a toys shop. Nothing else. How could ever someone so brilliant and smart find himself attracted to me? Or even a little interested? Because of those thoughts, I stopped writing to him and hid the phone under my pillow. Then, I tried to sleep.

What I didn’t surely expect was that, just the day after that night, he could come back to the shop again, but that time without his sister. I saw him from afar, slowly walking to reach the cash desk with his hands in his pockets and the expression of someone who just did something he shouldn’t have done. I stopped in the place, my elbows on the desk and my eyes looking at him with a little smile on my mouth: we both knew we were attracted, it was crystal clear.

«Ehy, you alone?»I asked, laying the chin on my palms and giving him a faintly malicious look. I had no idea how something like that could born so fastly, but I was amused. I felt free to be who I wanted, without fearing prejudices. 

«Yes I am. Sorry if I didn’t tell you I was going to come, but it would have been monotonous, and it seems that this job already has too much monotony. Am I right?»

He leaned on the desk too, just like I did before, and stopped there. Not too far, but not too near. 

«Oh, is this a surprise then?»

«Yeah, kinda.»

From that moment on, all happened so fast and unexpected that I didn’t even knew how we ended up in the storehouse, me laying on the floor on my knees and Jooheon pushing my head between his legs with a hand. It was the very first time for me, but that wasn’t a necessary information for Jooheon to know. He didn’t have to. I have to admit, in a certain sense it was me who brought him to that point. When I understood where he was going, I was afraid he was going to ask me the full thing, and I was going to end up bent before him and losing my virginity like that, in a toys shop. No, thanks, the blowjob was already too indecent for that place. And so, while he pushed my head on his cock, I looked at him, at all his expressions and every motion of his body. I loved how he moaned, he sounded so manly and I went crazy. Also, he tasted good. That day, I learned I really enjoyed giving head.

When we left the storehouse, I tried to make myself presentable and decent, hoping my cheeks weren’t red: I wasn’t that type of person to feel embarrassed or shy easily, but my skin was very sensitive and my colleagues could notice it and start talking. Before I could take my place behind the cash desk again, Jooheon grabbed me by a shoulder.

«I usually… I don’t usually am like this. I don’t know what—I didn’t obliged you, right?»

He was worried I felt obliged to fell on my knees before him? I nearly laughed. I came closer to him and stood on my toes – yeah, I’m pretty short – and I talked into his ear.

«If you consider this an obligation, feel freed to oblige me every time you feel like it.»

He smiled and then arranged his clothes better, while I finally took my place behing the shop desk again.

«When are we going to see each other again?»I asked, blantly drawing with my fingers on the desk something imaginary, only to end up with them stroking his hand. For just a moment, I was afraid he was going to reject me and think that all that thing had no sense, but intead he ended up holding my hand and smiling to me.

«Whenever you want.»


End file.
